The desire to open up can be very strong sometimes- the idea of someone actually being able to understand and walk along your healing process with you can be very attractive. But the things that can go wrong in this seemingly “easy” decision can be overwhelming.
When you first approach a person, you don’t think whether that person is the right one to share with, or will the conversation lead to disappointment you need to do without at this moment.
You don’t think whether trust and love are mutual. Seeking help isn’t as easy as picking a nice pair of shoes, or your choice of an ice-cream flavour, you see. Shoes or ice-creams don’t have to like you back; but the person, whose arms you want to run to, has to have some love for you, to be able to genuinely hold your pieces. Also, you aren’t sure whether that person is fine, and will be able to stay strong at this moment to be able to hold you.
And when you think all of this through, you’ll be amazed at the number of people you would simply strike out of the “life conversation” list.
It is for the better, trust me- not sharing at all is better than getting disappointed.
HARLI MARTEN
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